When Facebook Disappears

About three months ago, in a matter of minutes, everything changed. My Facebook account was hacked, a steady stream of messages poured into my inbox. As I went to report the security breach, my account was suddenly disabled. Three months later, I still have no access to my personal or writing page. Despite filing numerous appeals and contacting the Better Business Bureau I am still locked out.

I was in the midst of finishing my manuscript and threw myself into that work. Now, that I have met that deadline I am left considering what I have lost and what I have gained since Facebook disappeared.

What I have lost:

Facebook has become such a huge part of our lives, there is a pervading space of disconnection I feel. I wonder what announcement I have missed and what I don’t know. I miss encouraging others. I like affirming others and caring for them through struggles. I can still do this, but I am missing a large group of loved ones and friends that I don’t get to see on a daily basis.

I have lost a number of sweet friends that have supported me in my writing journey through my writing page. Something so valuable I fear it’s forever lost. How will I find them back? For a writer, that page is essential and mine is gone.

So many groups find their home on Facebook. We communicate through the group feature and that connection has been lost as well. The learning, supporting, and communication is very missed.

What I have gained:

A great deal of headspace. I feel open. A steady stream of information is not constantly entering my mind. I’ve had freedom to focus on things intentionally. Something that can be a great distraction has been completely removed.

I have been spared a great deal of heartache. Watching people argue makes my heart hurt. I hate conflict and watching it play out online makes me terribly unsettled. After the election, I had been feeling a great deal of sadness. There was so much unkindness emerging in new and surprising ways. Largely, I was able to miss much of that.

Facebook is perhaps like so many other things in our lives good in moderation and when used to affirm, uplift and connect. In the days ahead I have to decide whether to begin a new account, essentially starting over. Or I can continue waiting, praying and hoping what was taken will be restored. I pray that no matter what happens, God will protect what has already been build with About Proximity and our important work with Kids Talk Justice.

Know that I miss so many of you that I primarily interacted with in that space.

I would never abandon you, I just don’t quite know how to find my way back yet.